For me there are certainly plenty of aspects to this seemingly simple question. Overall however it is about the void that I saw, and the lack in understanding , its about what is missing and providing answers that were desperately needed.
I saw that there was an endless array of places to reference how to raise kids, how to raise boys, how to raise girls, how to raise infants, how to raise young children, youth, adolescents and so on.
Some of the more notable examples for me included Steve Bidulph and Celia Lashlie in particular. Their work and their integrity in this field is without question inspirational.
Further I saw plenty of books, courses and material on how to encourage your child , how to discipline your child, how to develop them academically, socially, athletically and on and on.
Thankfully I also saw some places that provide positive male role models and mentors to children, particularly for boys. Places that offer contact with good men. There are workshops, camps and retreats that provide a foundation to lots of kids.
There are also plenty of websites, blogs, community groups and places to go, that provide focus on how to be a better father, which again is great.
And for me this was all fantastic and I felt that many of these resources, communities and services really did make a difference.
But the question still burned, where do you go to address the foundational issues, the sub-conscious decisions made by children and youth about who they are and about how they fit into the world, about their self worth and how they see themselves, about their identity? Whether you read a parenting book, send you child to a mentoring group or what ever, how do you address these deeply entrenched and engrained beliefs that don’t support you or your children?
Where do you go for help on how to raise a child with no father around…where do you go if you, now as an adult, were raised in father absence?
Where does a mother go when as a single mom, trying to cope with the everyday pressures of life, when she knows that deep down, every now and then, something is missing in her child’s life and that these seemingly little occurrences have a very deep and lasting impact….
Where do you go to address the bias within the court system, within government and within general society (which holds attitudes more inline with the early 1800’s rather than 2015) that has no idea of the role and importance that fathers play in the lives and development of their children.
Where do you go when life seems like you are ‘Driving With The Breaks On….’
Where do you go when your children, despite being physically mature and well developed, are more like a A Tree Without Roots….when they lack the depth of masculine maturity.
I created the Father Code because of the void that I saw in the understanding that surrounds the cycle of father absence and it effects…
I created the Father Code because as a child raised by my single mum I knew the tremendous sacrifice that mothers make every day but I also knew the pain felt by children left by their fathers. Because I know the mistakes so easily made as a result of father absence.
I created the father code because as a father I now know the impact I have on the lives and futures of my children.
I created the father code because of the secrets that i discovered through my own journey and through over 32 years of research. I created the father code because I know how powerful the simple solutions that I discovered are and of the tremendous impact they have on the lives of men, women and children worldwide.
I created the Father Code because I believe that from adversity wisdom and beauty can flourish.
I created the Father Code because this is where the cycle of father absence is broken.